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Hub You - Build Deep Rapport by Delayed Matching
Measuring performance results is a great thing to do, but understanding the causes of those results is at least as worthwhile. Understanding causes means you have information about how to exercise more influence (or control) over those results. If you want your results to improve, you've got to change the right things about the process or activity or function that produces those results.Understanding the real causes of performance results means taking a more rigorous approach than knee-jerk reacting to hearsay, opinion or gut feel. Here are some basic techniques to help you navi
I want you to be seeing with your peripheral vision. Take into account the whole person. See with your peripheral vision, because that's where the most amount of information will come from. Oh and do all this while enjoying your conversation with them!
A lag time - then zero out the lag; use your peripheral vis
What is BNI?BNI is a networking organization for small and medium sized businesses with chapters all over the world. Most groups have between ten and thirty members who meet once a week, usually in the early morning or at lunch. The purpose of BNI is to generate sales for its members through referrals. In joining a BNI group each member commits to actively looking for potential customers for other members--the members of each BNI group act as each other's "sales team." Each group has only one representative of any given profession or business, allowing all relev
I'm just going along with him as he moves. As he moves I move - only later. And I'm not following him exactly, but I'm following him every time. So there is consistency to what I'm doing.
Here's the key - You can allow up to a half a minute delay but then start to zero it out. Meaning that as that person moves you're going to move closer and closer to when they move until pretty soon - he makes a move and you move right along with him. He makes another move and you move right along with him. But it 's okay to allow a lengthy delay to begin with.
Now if you're not going to have a long interaction with a person, you don't want a lengthy delay. You don't have time. So part of this will be judged by the context that you're in. If you only have a short interaction with them, you better get on it! Don't allow much of a delay because you aren't going to be there long enough to be able to to gain the rapport that you want.
So delay but close the gap!
To practice this: find someone to practice on/with and set your intention to pace their movements - use mirroring and as the persuader allow a lag, the lag can be anywhere up to 30 seconds. You can start with a 3 second lag and then zero it out over the next minute. So if the person I am pacing is sitting in a certain way and rocking a bit, I would wait 3 seconds and then I would rock and then wait a little less and rock with them again, and then pretty soon as he rocks I'm going to rock.
I want you to be seeing with your peripheral vision. Take into account the whole person. See with your peripheral vision, because that's where the most amount of information will come from. Oh and do all this while enjoying your conversation with them!
A lag time - then zero out the lag; use your peripheral visi
Have you walked down the cereal aisle lately?There is a lot you can learn from sitting surrounded by the boxes and bags of artificially sweated corn, rice and wheat for a few minutes observing marketing in action.If you look closely, you will see solid marketing, the result of leading experts. Just visiting your local grocery store’s cereal aisle is like attending master’s level seminar in marketing.You’re probably thinking that all the sugar has made us crazy but I assure you - we’re not.Here’s why the cereal aisle in your local grocery store influences how
Here's the key - You can allow up to a half a minute delay but then start to zero it out. Meaning that as that person moves you're going to move closer and closer to when they move until pretty soon - he makes a move and you move right along with him. He makes another move and you move right along with him. But it 's okay to allow a lengthy delay to begin with.
Now if you're not going to have a long interaction with a person, you don't want a lengthy delay. You don't have time. So part of this will be judged by the context that you're in. If you only have a short interaction with them, you better get on it! Don't allow much of a delay because you aren't going to be there long enough to be able to to gain the rapport that you want.
So delay but close the gap!
To practice this: find someone to practice on/with and set your intention to pace their movements - use mirroring and as the persuader allow a lag, the lag can be anywhere up to 30 seconds. You can start with a 3 second lag and then zero it out over the next minute. So if the person I am pacing is sitting in a certain way and rocking a bit, I would wait 3 seconds and then I would rock and then wait a little less and rock with them again, and then pretty soon as he rocks I'm going to rock.
I want you to be seeing with your peripheral vision. Take into account the whole person. See with your peripheral vision, because that's where the most amount of information will come from. Oh and do all this while enjoying your conversation with them!
A lag time - then zero out the lag; use your peripheral vis
Change is the only constant thing in the world and businesses are no exception to this universal principle. The aim of change is bringing about continuous improvement in the competitive world through which businesses hope to surpass their competitors to meet customer needs better than the rest.Change Meets ResistanceYou need to anticipate resistance from unexpected corners while contemplating and proposing change. This could be for the first Six Sigma project or for the subsequent project, despite rigorous results with previous project implementations. Workers may respond
Now if you're not going to have a long interaction with a person, you don't want a lengthy delay. You don't have time. So part of this will be judged by the context that you're in. If you only have a short interaction with them, you better get on it! Don't allow much of a delay because you aren't going to be there long enough to be able to to gain the rapport that you want.
So delay but close the gap!
To practice this: find someone to practice on/with and set your intention to pace their movements - use mirroring and as the persuader allow a lag, the lag can be anywhere up to 30 seconds. You can start with a 3 second lag and then zero it out over the next minute. So if the person I am pacing is sitting in a certain way and rocking a bit, I would wait 3 seconds and then I would rock and then wait a little less and rock with them again, and then pretty soon as he rocks I'm going to rock.
I want you to be seeing with your peripheral vision. Take into account the whole person. See with your peripheral vision, because that's where the most amount of information will come from. Oh and do all this while enjoying your conversation with them!
A lag time - then zero out the lag; use your peripheral vis
Last night I was watching the local news, and amidst all the typical doom and gloom stories the media loves to share, there was a fascinating interview that took place.The Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP – the way-over-made-fun-of guys in red with funny looking cowboy hats) blatantly egged on the Hells Angels. The RCMP officer being interviewed actually blamed the Hells Angels on pretty well all of the crime in Canada… you name it… they are to blame.Now, I don't condone what the Angels do, but I will say the RCMP are absolute morons to believe crime would disappear i
So delay but close the gap!
To practice this: find someone to practice on/with and set your intention to pace their movements - use mirroring and as the persuader allow a lag, the lag can be anywhere up to 30 seconds. You can start with a 3 second lag and then zero it out over the next minute. So if the person I am pacing is sitting in a certain way and rocking a bit, I would wait 3 seconds and then I would rock and then wait a little less and rock with them again, and then pretty soon as he rocks I'm going to rock.
I want you to be seeing with your peripheral vision. Take into account the whole person. See with your peripheral vision, because that's where the most amount of information will come from. Oh and do all this while enjoying your conversation with them!
A lag time - then zero out the lag; use your peripheral vis
What business can you start for less than $100, with no experience, no employees and make $500 or more a week within a month?Your own house cleaning business!You can start a house cleaning business for well under $100, possibly less. You don't need a college degree, you don't need to purchase an expensive franchise, you don't need to take classes.All you really need is the desire to offer a much-needed service to your neighbors, one that will bring you a larger-than-working-at-Wal-Mart income, and will also give you a huge sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.<
I want you to be seeing with your peripheral vision. Take into account the whole person. See with your peripheral vision, because that's where the most amount of information will come from. Oh and do all this while enjoying your conversation with them!
A lag time - then zero out the lag; use your peripheral vision; and enjoy talking with them.
Your unconscious mind is to really get this! You can simultaneously take a fly on the wall position to watch it being done, to evaluate is it being done right and how can you do it better. You will see how to fine tune it for the next time you do it. The goal is to observe it in action in a way that it's being done so you can pick up how it's working and then be more effective with it yourself.
You can do this in 3 minute chunks and then get feedback from the meta fly on the wall position and then do it again incorporating the learning from the meta position.
Mirroring and Matching
Mirroring is: If I stand and look in a mirror, that person I'm looking at is going to be doing what I'm doing. Mirroring is simply - if I move my right hand, you're going to move your... left hand. If I scratch with my left arm, you scratch with your right arm.
Matching is: If I raise my left hand, you raise your left hand. You match the movements with your same hand. In general you want to mirror - not match. Mirroring will build deeper and stronger rapport.
Distinction between mirroring and matching
I make a distinction here because I hear it all the time from people saying, "I was mirroring and matching." They may have misunderstood their training and thus they are confused when they get results and when they don't get results. So my intention is to make sure there is no confusion here. so that if you have always referred to it this way, I want you to know what these things are so you can start to take control of your own behavior and you can get the results that you're really looking to get. You will find yourself, with enough ti
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